Why Do It?

It's been a long time since I've used my name.com and over the last few days began to wonder if I should be blogging there instead of here...I'm still deciding whether to or not, so if you don't find me here, you certainly can there.

I wrote an introduction there that I thought I might use here as a blog. My characters here are limited and I always have more to say than that. It comes under the heading of why I do what I do...here's your share...

'Where does one begin to take a journey of a lifetime of steps...except at the beginning.

When I was about ten years old my mother began giving me what I always called 'lessons in womanhood'. But time and space left many unanswered questions; most of which became confused by gender roles, expectations unmet and generally leaving me to question what it was ultimately lacking in why I wasn't happy in my interpersonal relationships. Why was it that the men who asked me to marry them didn't feel like 'forever'? I've written so often that all that I had ever wanted was 'one guy; one time' and it's be as elusive a dream as it always has been.

A few years ago, I came across someone who had spoken highly of Dr. Pat Allen. After reading her first book 'Getting To I Do', I realized that she was absolutely correct. Her work, to me, was like coming home to a place inside of me that I had once known when the world was simpler and filled with a lightness and joy. Before a time when the societal outside world told both men and women that they were 'wrong' in their understanding of how to 'handle' their relationships. What I realized is how much I was missing the masculine and feminine tradtional roles, and how much happier I was as I woman when I was treated that way. In fact what I realized was that the more masculine a man is, the more feminine I feel in his presence; and how very much I want more of it. That I want to turn my sails into his wind and have him take me on a journey that I would not have had had it not been for his lead and direction.

For many years, I mentored in the real estate field; but I was selective. Anyone who approached me and asked me to mentor them needed to give me a big enough reason 'why' or I wouldn't give of my time...for example the electrician who fell off of scafolding and tried to grab it stop himself from falling. After several surgeries and a year, he still couldn't work but had a family who depended on his income.

When I chose to mentor, I did it for two reasons. The first was that had it not been for those who gave unselfishly of their time when I needed it, I would not be where I am today. In fact, I can say of my first real estate mentor, that EVERYTHING that I am, is because of him. That love remains for him unending. The same goes for my second mentor who spent 8 hours per day standing in front a room teaching, but spent that 8 hours looking into my face as if I were the only one sitting in that room. He once sent me an email saying 'you have learned well' and I hold that moment of pride in my heart. So my reason for sharing what I've learned here brings me back full circle to the cusp of my begining. I choose to give as a part of my legacy what will be inherited from me to my collective daughters who sit have and continue to sit here at my knee; real lessons in womanhood.'